Bear has opened his eyes!

He's SUCH a doll, such a sweetheart. He loves me, opens his eyes to my voice, and falls asleep right away in my arms (unlike Sandi's or T's, which he doesn't recognise their smell). He lovvvves forehead kisses, and receives millions of them a visit. He's approx. 20 oz, 8" long, and one ear is down and one ear is up so far. He's not that furry, but I'm hoping he gains more fuzz as he gets older.

I love you Boo-Bear and only 5 more days until I get to see you!! <3

Bear 2 Weeks

BEAR! 1 Week

Winter Break

School's finally over. I made it through finals with 2 As and 2 Bs. I'm pretty happy with that.

I get so sad every time I look at google plus, I've actually deleted and blocked the site. hah. All my friends are having babies and I want a little one sooOOOO bad but I also want a career, so baby has to wait for mommy to finish school. GAH. So hard.

Little ideas about our wedding floats around the cold winter air, and I try to bring it up to jay as little as possible. He's so entranced in his new job he barely has time for anything any more, much less planning a wedding.

This year for some reason I went all out on Jay's Christmas presents. Which is kinda funny because it's also my most financially strapped christmas yet. (Thankfully Jay pays the bills.)

I'm officially signed up for Biology 175, Math 123, Chemistry 105, and Yoga. 2 easy classes and 2 hard classes. Should be a breeze! I just went and bought all of my school supplies for spring. It's going to be a good semester.

OH. And I officially stopped olanzapine today. We'll see how I detox - I'm definitely not looking forward to withdrawls, but my doctor said going cold turkey was the best way to get off of it. Which seemed outrageous to me, but hey, whatever he says.

School's Over!

All I have is a math final and a nutrition final and I'm DONE. Then I have three weeks off and then I get to start all over again with Chemistry, Human Biology, Math, and yoga. YAY.

My final grades were
Nutrition B
Sociology A
English A
Math B

Which I'm pretty stoked about - my midterm grades were all Bs.

Jay's birthday is coming up, and I bought him one of those copper chef pans you see on TV. He LOVES it, and I'm so grateful I found something he'll actually use. (He's an amazing chef btw.) I finished all my Christmas shopping, so now I'm just waiting for packages to come in the mail so that I can wrap them. I'm an awful wrapper. It's embarrassing.

Well, that's about all the news I have for December so far!

School's Going Good

I'm ready for this semester to be overwith so I can start on some of my lab classes. Chemistry is going to be hard, but it'll be okay. I made it through this semester (almost finished!) and I can make it through Chemistry.

Jay is loving his new job. He's liking that he's in a manager position as opposed to being a peon.

My meds are slowly being titrated, it will take a couple of months to get on the high dose i need to be on. It's a patience-taxing thing.

That's all the news I have so far! Sorry it seems like it's always the same thing...

Fall Cleaning

Now that I'm home more often and working less (I'll completely stop working in January) I've come up with a cleaning schedule for our home. Yours may look different based on what you have going on certain days.

Everyday:
        -Dishes
        -Make bed
     
Monday:
        -Sweep and mop kitchen and wood floors
        -Vacuum
Tuesday:
        -Clean mirrors
        -Clean toilets
        -Thoroughly clean kitchen
        -Do laundry
Wednesday:
        -Clean bedroom
        -Clean closet
        -Do laundry
Thursday
        -Thoroughly clean living room
        -Clean entryway and porch
        -Thoroughly clean bathrooms

And here's a couple lists that will help fill the gaps!

And here's a fun way to use essential oils for your home:

Spring Semester

So I've registered for Spring classes. I'm taking yoga, math, chemistry, chemistry lab, psychology, and medical terminology. I'm finally feeling like I'm in the routine and swing of college. Everything (classes, buildings) is becoming familiar and I'm feeling more comfortable at NIC.

Jay is loving his new day job, and I am too =). It's so exciting to wake up in the morning and go to bed at night!

He's on his way to a weekend nursing wound care conference in Boise, and I'll be at home tending... home.

I hope you're all having a wonderful November,
Em

Update: September 2016

Time is just flying by! Jay accepted a new manager position at Life Care Center, and will be returning there end of October. I work one day a week as an aide there.

Besides those changes, life has been flying by because school is crazy busy. I'm getting B's, which I am actually proud of (this stuff is hard!). If I can get B's all throughout school I'll be a happy camper.

I'm still gaining weight, despite how careful I am being, and I've reached 156. I made an appointment with my doctor to get off olanzapine and prozac, and to get back on lamictal, wellbutrin, and buspar. I'm not looking forward to the dull feeling I get from those drugs but I am looking forward to not being so tired all the time, and the weight loss.

I brought my wedding dress home. It only needs a little hemming and it will be good to go - it fits a little tight, which I'm thankful for because I will be losing some weight.

I'll post more later,

Emily

Benefits of a Clean Home

I enjoyed this post, hopefully you will too!

Friendly Share

I was blessed by this blog post and thought I'd share.

Quiet Times for Couples | Today's Date

I'm going through a daily devotional (however, sometimes it's semi-daily, but that's ok), and I'm loving todays, so I thought I would share it.

I love the thought of getting OVER your thoughts. Stop thinking about the PAST, and look brightly into the future! Rehearse your victories, instead of rehearsing every bad thing you've ever done.

51 weeks until my wedding!

My goal is to lose 30 pounds in 50 weeks.. That's about half a pound a week. I'm going strict vegan/pescatarian. I will be posting what I eat on instagram and snapchat. One day of the week I will post what I eat here on the blog.

My current weight is 150. I'm a size 8 dress. My goal is to get to a four at least. Being on olanzapine has been SO hard for me! I hate that it makes me gain weight, but I have been much, much more stable with my BPD, so it's a hard balance. It's going to be even harder to LOSE weight, much less keep it at a stable level, but I know I can do it. <3

Wedding Venue

For the past couple months Jay and I have mutually agreed that we were going to have our wedding at our house. The cost of a venue is just too expensive. Well, I started going to a new church a couple of weeks ago, and they have a team center. And it is gorgeous. And I've decided I am having my wedding THERE. It's SO beautiful and perfect, and cost effective. I'm SO grateful.

This is actually the back part of the building, where the ceremony will be.

Work Less, Study More

I've dropped down to working one day a week. I can't study enough it seems like, and I'm getting B's. I am trying super hard, but that isn't enough. I am used to being a straight A student, so getting B's and the occasional C is hard for me. Thankfully it's all graded on a curve. <3

Jay is doing well, working a lot. My friend assumed my car lease, so that has helped with the bills.

Generally we are doing well and getting by.

Bible Questions | Genesis 14-25

15:6, It was impossible to please God in the old testament, with the exception of offering a burnt offering to God. In this verse it explains that Abram's faith made him righteous in God's eyes.

20:2, Abraham lies to King Abimelech and God does not punish him for lying.

22:5, Abraham lies to servants about bringing Isaac back from the trip. He knew God had commanded him to kill Isaac, so why did he tell the servants they would both be right back?

24:16, It's funny how 'marriage' and 'virgin' are used here.

24:67,  Sex made them married. Hmm.

I'm thoroughly enjoying the NLT. It's SO much easier to read than the KJV.

Why I Hate Religion

Bible Questions | Genesis 1-13

As I am reading through my new Bible, there have been questions that arise. I will share them here and if you have answers for me, you can comment or email me. I would greatly appreciate it.

My first observation was that in the garden of Eden, God prioritized rawness higher than honesty. For example, God knew that Adam and Eve had eaten of the fruit, but he asked them anyway, because He wants us to be honest with Him. All He wanted was an honest answer.

I'm confused about Genesis 4:7, "...Sin is crouching at the door, eager to control you. But you must subdue it and be its master." This is hinting that you are able to live without sin and that confuses me.

I also wonder what the mark God put on Cain was.

It also occurs to me a year is never specified as 365 days. A year could have been what we call a month, and so the people weren't really living to 900 years old.

Genesis 8:22 states how global warming is not a thing.

In Genesis 10:5 it states how the tower of Babel wasn't the first place to have different languages. Also 10:25.

Another question I had was, in Genesis 12, Abram was deceitful to Pharaoh about who Sarai really was, but God blessed him anyway. Why was lying to Pharaoh ok in this instance? Isn't lying always frowned upon?

That's as far as I've gotten in my bible so far, but I'm sure lots more questions will arise.

Youth leaves home to play ball!

I found this interesting article on the internet the other day, and thought I would post it.

I struggle with the idea of the church, and often go back to the forum on Topix where so many people that have left the church debate on it's right or wrongness. I'm going to start going to a Bible study with my cousin, and just maybe that will clear things up for me. If not, at least it's something positive in my life.

Why School is Way Harder than I Thought it Would Be

Do I really need to explain? College is Tough. I'm barely (just barely) getting good grades. Nutrition is by far my hardest class. Then Sociology is next. I don't know why Sociology is so hard, maybe because I don't understand how it can be a college course at all.

English is fantastic, I love it. And math is going very well too. I'm NOT looking forward to Chemistry and Biology. But it has to be done, I suppose.

Working Saturday and Sunday is enough for me. By Sunday night I'm thoroughly tired and can't wait to get home.


The dress I ordered for our engagement photos got here today - and it is gorgeous. I can't wait to wear it.

My Ring

Better Grade Than I Thought

Today in sociology we all passed around our papers, and graded them. I thought I received mine back and it was graded at 80%, and I was actually very happy with that grade (it's better than an F!) but then someone messed up and it wasn't my paper. I was graded with 100%. I was pretty proud of myself.

I broke my phone screen today. I ran into Verizon to get it fixed but they couldn't fix it, I had to do it through Zaggs, which is an online program that offers lifetime warranties on your phone screens. So I went online and exchanged my phone protector out, and they're sending a new one out pronto.

I'm going into work tonight to cover a shift for 7-10. It will be good to see that extra $$ on my check.

Wedding Planning

Now that I'm back on track with medications, I'm ready to begin planning (or rather, continue planning) my wedding. It will be super busy with school and everything, but we'll get'r done.

Here is my wedding website. There's not much there so far, but I'll continue to add things as time progresses.

The colors of my wedding are sage and blush.

I can't decide whether I'll wear a white dress or a blush dress, but I do have the style picked out. It will be a very formal reception, but the ceremony will be relaxed. We're estimating around 80 people, so it will be a small wedding; which I love.

Labor Day

It was so nice to have nothing on my agenda. Now to study and do homework...

Meds + Essential Oils

I'm back on birth control, as I mentioned, because my current meds are class D. (Fatal to the fetus.)

I'm on olanzapine and fluoxetine. (Zyprexa and Prozac)

Olanzapine has a wide amount of side effects, of which the worst are:

• Allergic reactions
• Blurred vision
• Fast or uneven heartbeat 
• Fever
• Night sweats
• Excessive restlessness
• Jerky muscle movement that's uncontrolled
• Severe sleepiness
• Liquid discharge from breasts

I have suffered from every one of the above side effects, but thankfully they only last for a short time while your body is adjusting to the med, and then they go away.

Fluoxetine also has a varied amount of side effects, of which the worst are:

• Confusion
• Anxiety
• Night sweats
• Nausea 
• Dissiness
• Trouble sleeping

Among other things. 

Mainly I'm on the olanzapine to keep my mania in check, and I'm on the fluoxetine to keep my depression in check. I'm an odd mix of Bipolar 1 and Bipolar 2, whereas I'll go for months in one stage, and then go for months in the other. 

Normal people are like the purple. They have happy moments and sad moments. Bipolar 1 people are crazy energetic and hardly ever get sad. Bipolar 2 people sleep a lot and hardly smile. 

Even with my meds, and not wanting to be on any more than I HAVE to, I still get horrible anxiety and have frequent anxiety attacks. HOWEVER, I've been able to really keep them in check lately, using essential oils. I use Eden's Garden essential oils, and I've never had a problem with them and I LOVE them. The current blend I'm using is bergamot, clary sage, frankincense, German chamomile, melissa, neroli, rosewood, vetiver and ylang ylang. I also put pine in, but mostly for the smell. I mix it with almond carrier oil. 

I'm so glad I invested in such a wide variety of oils!

Nutrition Quiz

I got an A on my nutrition quiz, I was pretty proud of myself.

Sociology is just a bunch of hooey I feel like, but I'm trying to understand it better. We're studying cultural universals right now, and I was supposed to give some examples of them.
1) Sticking your tongue out is an acceptable way to point in some cultures, and is deemed an act of disrespect in others.
2) Wearing clothes is optional in some cultures, whereas in our culture it is not optional and is even illegal to walk around without clothes.
3) In general, especially traditionally, the male gender were the sole providers of the families, whereas in some cultures, it is the woman (I know this to be particularly true of an African tribe).

And those are just a few.

Jay is drafting for football season today: read, "Emily did not see Jay tonight." lol. He has been in his man-cave all night. But it's given me time to study sociology so I don't mind.

I work one more week of Friday-Satuday-Sunday and then I'm scheduled for Saturday-Sunday-Tuesday forever.  I might have to drop the Tuesday, but we'll see.

If I didn't have a car payment I wouldn't have to work hardly at all but my payment is huge and I must pay for it. It is nice to own my own car and not have to worry about borrowing a car.

Well, I'm off to pinterest the night away,
See you soon!

Singled Out

I was pretty proud of myself when my Sociology instructor explained to the class, "Now don't be too ashamed of your grade, no one got 100%. Except Emily." And he handed me my paper. 100%. I was the only one, really? Well, I felt pretty special I won't lie.

School in general is going good, I have a few quizzes coming up in Nutrition.

Jay is doing well, we're just going through a lot of crap with this guy who was supposed to come paint the interior of our house, and he never showed, so now we gotta try to get our money back and it's all a bunch of hooey. We might have to take him to small claims court. Hopefully he just pays us.

I'm weighing in at 146, so I've lost four pounds. I still feel like a moose, don't get me wrong. But every little bit helps me feel better.

Well, I better get to cleaning these carpets, they aren't gonna clean themselves!

Scheduling

After re reading my post, and going to a few more classes, I realized it will be impossible for me to work full time and go to school full time. I'm taking 12 credits. So, I dropped one work day a week.
Essentially, I have Thursday to catch up on schoolwork.

I'm in four classes.

First is Math, and it's ridiculously easy. Like, I learned this in 4th grade, easy.
Second is Sociology. And it's basically all BS. Honestly. "How does society think?"
Third is Nutrition. Which is a hard class. But it will be worth it. Plus it's prepping me for Micro. (Puke.)
And lastly is English Comp. I LOVEEEEEE this class. It's probably my favorite besides math. I just love the teacher, she's so eccentric.

Routine

After many tears, I finally feel comfortable at my job. I think it was just a bad week to start school and a new job all at the same time. I just started birth control again because my meds are class D, (which essentially means they are lethal to a fetus). Anyway, my birth control makes me super emotional for the first month because I essentially skip a period. And that week that I was skipping a period, was right during my first week of work/first week of school.

Needless to say there were several panic attacks and lots of tears, but my coworkers have been AMAZING and supportive. I LOVE them. So glad I get to work with such amazing people.

Today I'm going to take some clothes back to Kohls, pick up some school supplies at Walmart, and finish my Sociology homework. I've completed my math, english, and nutrition homework already.

Looking back at my first week at work I keep thinking how silly and overreactive I was being;  thinking that I couldn't pick up the job. But it's actually really easy, and I love it.

Jay works tonight and I have school Wednesday. Actually, we changed my work schedule, so I will be

Sunday/work
Monday/school
Tuesday/work
Wednesday/school
Thursday/work
Friday/school
Saturday/work

It's going to be hectic with no days off, but it will be worth it in the end.

First Day of Work

My first day of work at Life Care Center went well, but it was very overwhelming. There was so many people to remember. I'm sure it will only get easier with time, but it was a hard first day. I loved my coworkers though, which is always a plus.

I work the next four days, and then I start school on Monday, but I'm a little anxious for school because I don't feel prepared at all -- I don't even have my school books. Hopefully we can get them soon.

I haven't done well on my diet, I ate two sloppy joes last night. But I had a nice big salad at work. I am loving the 8 hour shifts, I feel like I have a lot more time at home to rest and recoup.

Until next time!

Job Shadowing

So I finished my hygienist job shadow today at my local dentist. I love his office and I'm so glad I get to shadow there. It was a pretty uneventful day; mostly just routine cleanings; but it was good to see nonetheless.

I start work tomorrow and work until Sunday, and then start school up again on Monday. Busy week ahead! But I'm so grateful for 8 hour shifts, I can finally sleep in!

Update: August 2016

 After such a bad experience at Kootenai Health, I wanted to return to North Idaho Advanced Care Hospital, but that didn't work out. Thankfully Life Care Center hired me, and I'm back working at Life Care Center Coeur d'Alene. I start orientation there tomorrow morning.

Then on Tuesday I have my FIRST ever job shadow at Dr Delwin Dick's Dentistry. I'm SUPER excited! I've never done a job shadow before, but I'm certain only good things will come of it. I'm planning on job shadowing one day a month, to get in the routine of dental hygiene.

I'm still weighing in at 150, but I've been very careful about what I have been eating lately. I've been sticking to the 80/20 vegan diet, and I'm sure good things will come in time.

Tonight Jay is off to work while I am at home, hopefully for the last uneventful night in a long time.

I have orientation Monday,  job shadowing Tuesday, I'm getting my tattoo finished Wednesday, and hopefully I start work Thursday!

What I Ate Today

Breakfast: granola with almond milk

Lunch: a banana and grapes
Dinner: Vegan veggie burrito

Exercise: 30 minutes cardio

Current weight 150. Goal weight 120.

What I Ate Today

Saturday 8/13
Breakfast: Granola and almond milk
Lunch: Banana
Snack: CLIF bar
Dinner: QDoba vegan naked burrito

Snack: Chips and salsa
Late night munchy: Granny smith apple
Exercise: Brisk walk around neighborhood, 3 miles

Current weight: 150. Goal weight: 120.

This Week's Yoga Sequence

Today This video has really hit home for me. I loved the simplicity of the flow. Hope you enjoy as welll!

Weight Tracking

Since my relapse, I've been put back on medication. I'm not thrilled, but it seems it's my only choice right now. Anti-psychotics make you gain weight my doctor said. But she didn't tell me I would gain TWENTY FIVE pounds. Yes, I've gained a whopping 25 pounds. Granted, I'm still only 145 lbs, which means my BMI is still within 'normal' range, but I don't feel good -- or comfortable.

SO.

I'm going to track what I eat/when I exercise on my instagram. I hope you all enjoy reading what I eat/what I do to work out and HOPEFULLY it will keep me excited about weight loss. Just remember to have patience with me because gaining weight on antipsychotics is easy, but losing is two times harder. But I know I can do this!

My weight: 145.
Goal weight: 120.

Before pictures:
And no, I'm not pregnant, that's just my poochy extra 25 pounds showing!

Update: July

Things have been going well around our neck of the woods!

I went back to my old job at Northern Idaho Advanced Care Hospital - sometimes the grass isn't always greener! I will be working weekend nights, but that's what I asked for; so I'm excited they could accommodate my needs. I'm also doing full time school (pre reqs for Dental Hygiene.)
Explanations of photos from top left to top right:

• I got more filled in on my tattoo, it's coming along nicely.
• Wyatt Cecil working on my tattoo.
• My 21st birthday outing!
• My first legal beer.
• Jay and I on my 21st birthday. He bought me my first legal drink.
• My first legal drink - hot sake!
• Got my horizontal license!
• Got my NIC school ID.
• Jay and I went floating.
• We go on a lot of walks as well.
• Which we have to stop and take selfies for, of course.
• I put my ring back on - we're trying to work things out.
• I got my hair balayaged.
• I got a new Kate Spade purse!
• YAY I can finally sit in the bars now!
• My mom and sister took me out to paint some pottery for my birthday. It was a lot of unexpected fun!

Update: June

As everyone is well aware, Jay and I cancelled our engagement.

I wasn't ready to settle down, and Jay needed some more time as well. Now that we've had a couple months to re think and re wind, we are pleased to announce that we could not live with out each other! The wedding is NOT back on. We will take that very slowly, if at all. But I do have my engagement ring back on.

I had gotten off my psych medications in order to try to get pregnant; but clearly, I can not function without the medications. I made some pretty out of character choices and hurt Jay. Thankfully I'm back on medications and doing seemingly even better than I was before.

This summer Jay and I will re learn each other and have fun, and then during the winter we'll decide whether marriage is something we want to pursue.

Meanwhile, I am enrolled in college full time; doing dental hygiene. I love it so far but it's a lot harder than I thought it should have been.

The pets are all fine, and getting fat as ever.

Hoping that things can only get better from here.

XOXO

Update - May

Jay and I have been very busy the past few weeks. I've been working overtime, and for a while we were working Sunday-Saturday with no days off! Glad that's over.

Right now I'm sitting in our living room drinking some water (finally got our fridge fixed - yay!) and Jay is sleeping. I'm not sure about me being on day shift while he is on night shift; I really wish he would come to day shift. The way our schedule works, we won't see each other for about 4 days out of the week - not even in passing. That will be awful, but at least we will have the same days off.

I've been working on dental stuff, I'm ready to get my NIC dental assisting certificate overwith so I can start my associates degree in dental hygiene.

It's been slightly rainy here and there, but we did have one 85 degree day. I love summer in Idaho!

I've been planning and sorting and dreading (ha) our engagement photos, our honeymoon, the wedding, a pregnancy(hopefully!), and a babymoon. We're also remodeling the house, just to add to the stress. (Insert sarcastic face here.)

Our houseguest moved out yesterday. Now it's time to do some serious cleaning.

It's been crazy around here, but it's been fun. And the paycheck is worth it.

More later. xo

I just can't help but gawk at my ring *every* time I look down. Gah! So beautiful.

We planted some beautiful flowers in front of our house. We also bought the above plants for indoor color and decoration.

We bought a BBQ! We needed one bad.

The aMinols. :)

Wedding seating charting is probably the worst thing EVER.

Sketches for my next tattoo.

Delicious alkaline fertility tea! 

Housing

Today a friend moved in downstairs for a short period of time - we're not exactly sure how long. I'm so excited to be able to do this for a friend, for at one point it's exactly what a dear friend mother/figure did for me!

Everyone needs a place now and then and I'm just so excited that we were able to do it for someone. Especially with our huge guest room downstairs with it's own master bath. Woot!

Ink

So, this happened Thursday.

It's about day four and I'm itching like CRAZY!

The two roses symbolize Jay and I. As we have children (God-willing?) I might add more down the back. We shall see. I was SO excited to be able to add to my ink collection. :)

One of my friends asked if it hurt. Nooooo, it feels like cashmere! HA. Realistically though, mostly it just feels comparable to either a cat scratch or someone scratching you with their nail. Or have you ever ripped the skin on your knuckle off? It feels like that. Some spots it feels exactly like a bee sting, but for the most part ink doesn't hurt. (And if it did, I certainly would not be getting more!)

___________________________________________


I've been losing track of everything these days - my food, my weight; all of my focus has been going into work and learning a new routine there. I need to be on here more so I can take accountability a little better! I'll try to work on that.

Emotionally I have been all over the place lately. It's coming up on that time of year where I can't keep my lows up even when I'm doing everything I can. I contemplate returning to chemical assistance, and then back off, and then think about it again. I did finally resort to making a phone call to one of my MDs to see if we could get me on something low-key for a couple months. This time of year is really hard for me. We'll see how that appointment goes. I know I need something; I've backtracked a little in my progress. That's why they call it a journey though, I suppose. There's ups AND downs. My downs are just a little more intense than others' and usually involve bandages at the end of the day. Sigh.

I visited my family for a day last week; that was fun. My favorite part is always the singing. :)

Jobu-kitty and Sham (the pup) are doing well. Sham has something up with her toe nails where they are constantly growing like crazy. We'll see what's up with that this Saturday with her vet.

I'm excited for this summer! I'm thinking about buying a bicycle. That would be SO much fun. I can't wait! I also want to go paddleboarding lots this summer. :)

WELL, I have an early morning meeting that I better be semi-rested for, so I'll go for now.

I'll write to you more later on!

Emily

Easter Sunday | Reminiscing

You know what I miss? I miss Sunrise Service. 

And the funny thing was, it wasn't ever about the resurrection. I know that Easter Sunday was ALL about the resurrection (as I was taught growing up), but that's not what I miss. 

I miss being woken up early (3-4am) and cuddling with dad, and allowing us to have coffee the one day out of the year. I miss having waffles and huckleberry sauce. I miss mom tugging at my foam curlers, and the afro that we made on purpose as the end result. I miss all my frilly Easter dresses and the "big" heels (1") that I got to wear on Easter Sunday. And we would always have new nylons. I always remember the joy of putting on a fresh pair of nylons. (#itsthelittlethings?) And then we would put layer upon layer upon LAYER of clothing on to stay warm. 

All while it was still pitch black.

Mom would give us girls a new Bible, one without pictures, a "grown up bible", and one chocolate bunny; which of course we ate in ten seconds flat.

Then we would pack everyone up in the car, like little marsh mellows, and drive up the mountain to watch the sunrise and sing hymns. And it was always kind of magical, seeing the purple and orange sunrise come over the mountains.

Maybe it's not the resurrection or even the formality and repetitiveness of our actions that I miss, maybe it's the magical sunrise. Hmm. I feel like the sunrise is God's way of letting me feel His Grace and Abundance and Presence one more time.

Update for February/March 2016

New things in our lives:

*I bought a Macbook Pro 15 Retina! I LOVE it. It's so much better than my Chromebook. (Although I really loved my Chromebook.)

*I got a new iPhone 6s, but i might have already mentioned that. I was tired of not having any room anymore to take pictures on my 16gig Phone 5s, so I upgraded to the 128gig. I will NEVER use all of that - even if I videoed every second of my day!

*I started a new job at Kootenai Health! I'm on the third floor and I love it. I have only done orientation training (two weeks worth!) and pre-employment classes, but I work an actual shift on my unit tomorrow. I will be on day shift for a couple weeks, night shift for a couple weeks, and then on day shift permanently. I'm really excited! I LOVE early mornings - I'm SUCH a morning person. I feel like I wake up REALLY late when I wake up at 7:45 or 8am!

*I'm re-starting dental assisting classes at my local college. They're all online, thus the new laptop. Since I bought my laptop straight from Apple, they are offering a student credit discount which I'm STOKED about!

What we've been up to lately:

*We went to an Irish music concert. That was fun!

*We've been walking a lot more. I'm excited for that! We also took a hike on Higgins point and for some reason I had trouble getting up the really steep hill - I ended up spraining my wrist; long story short. Sooo it's in a brace for now. It was really bruised!

*Looking for a new truck. Always. Jay's extremely particular about his truck. x) It has to be JUST SO or he won't buy it. Which I suppose is a good thing. We want white, definitely, and it must have an 8"+ backup camera. (We've been spoiled with backup cameras. They're just too efficient!) Other than that, we're looking at Toyota, Chevy, GMC, Ford, anything really. It's just finding one at the right price, too. We don't want to pay over 31K.

*I went bowling with Jay. I watched Jay bowl. Yes. I watched. :)

I THINK that's all the updates so far!

New Job, New iPhone

I officially start working at Kootenai Health on Monday. I'm super excited!

I also picked up an iPhone 6s 128gb because I was tired of my iPhone 5s 16gb running out of room. Blah.

I bought lots of scrubs for our specific department colors at Kootenai and I'm really excited to wear new scrubs!

Wedding Buzz!

The very first baby steps of our wedding planning has begun! We've chosen a (albeit tentative) date, June 17th, 2017. If it's not that date, (which it most likely WILL be), it will be September 17th, 2017.

I already had several wedding planning books on hand, and so I started checking things off my wedding planning timeline checklist.

Click here to read how to make your wedding day less nerve-wracking!
(I'll need this...)

12+ months before (or ASAP)
Done: "Announce your engagement and spread the word. After you've told your friends and family and changed your Facebook status, consider sending in a newspaper engagement announcement...." (We've chosen not to announce in the newspapers quite yet.)
Done: "Get organized. Create a separate e-mail folder to keep all wedding-related communication and research together...."
Done: Envision your overall wedding style and colors.
To Do: Draw up your wedding budget with help from your families.
To Do: Have your engagement ring insured.
Done: Choose a wedding date and time.
To Do: Outline the initial guest list. (Eek! This is so hard for me. I would probably have a billion people invited if it weren't for money.)
Done: Create your wedding website. (It's finished but I'm not publishing it until June 2016!)
To Do: Research reception and ceremony sites.
To Do: Book any priority vendors if there's any you HAVE to have.
To Do: Interview and book a wedding planner.

Hmm. Should I book a wedding planner? Or just pay a friend to do it? When you got married, did you book a planner? How did that go? Would you recommend one?

All checklist items taken from the knot ultimate wedding planner by carley roney.

Abbotsford, Canada | Engagemoon

Jay and I had planned a while back to venture to Canada to see his cousin and the lay of the land; and I thought he was going to propose, but he did so a week premature to my thinking - which was fine with me!

Anyways, here are just a few pictures from our quick weekend trip.

As soon as we got home I had to work, but ended up calling off the rest of the week because I had somehow contracted Strep throat and had to go on Penicillin for 6 days. Gah.

The baby-steps are complete in my wedding planning; I have announced and have started my wedding website which should be complete by June, 2016.

Since it was my first time as an adult to Canada, they pulled us over at the border and had us go inside to verify identity. 

Obligatory travel selfie. 

We enjoyed quiet mornings with GREAT Tim Horton's coffee at our cousin's apartment. Lovely! 

A small ceremony was held in honor of Jay's mother who passed away last September. Her grandparents (whom she was closest to) were buried in Canada and she wished to be as well. 

We had good food at an Irish bar! 

I wanted to get more pictures, but I was feeling SO nauseated and car sick from the trip (literally four days of nausea) that I could hardly walk around, much less pose and grin.